This post is shared by Laura one of our amazing staff members. She is a tremendous asset to our team. Her understanding of military spouses comes from her personal experiences and a ton of research. Her husband is headed home from Afghanistan now. Please pray for their family as they will be reuniting in the coming weeks.
During our retreat, Lisa shared how she received “the gift of time” in which to build the concepts for Compass. Every day, each of us receives gifts, if we can open our minds to that concept. In April, my family received the news of another combat deployment. I immediately shifted into recognizing the separation as a gift to cherish my children like never before. Gone were the days of, “No, honey, mommy’s too busy to _______ (fill in the blank) because of _______ (fill in the blank again, like a million household chores).” It is so hard to imagine how hard it is for our loved ones to just walk away from family life and then casually step back in a year later…It’s not that simple.
I made it a priority to capture those cherished family moments, those intentional memories of scrapbooking, swimming, rollerskating, talent shows, bike riding, gymnastics, crafts, etc. into digital photos to send to him. This allowed us to intentionally include him in our daily lives, hoping it was helpful and uplifting for him. Showing the girls the importance of family, writing Daddy, sending him photos and artwork and care packages, getting involved in various military support efforts – these gestures are crucial values that show the love, respect, and honor we have for our troops. After all, they are sacrificing their gift of time, and many sacrifice so much more.
The mission of Compass encourages families to spend “intentional” time together. Life’s busy-ness can steal the gift of time, and sometimes, it can’t be recaptured in the same way. Lessons learned from the first deployment of staying up and mopping at midnight, I am now recognizing what to triage and how to best manage my time for my family’s sake. So giving myself permission to stop doing chores and read a book has provided just the opportunity to savor a wonderful story that supports this notion of intentional time.
In his book, Raising Kids for True Greatness, Dr. Kimmel shares a family vignette. “[The parents] prove that you don’t need a lot of time to make a difference in your kids’ life; you just have to be deliberate. But when you extend that deliberateness throughout an entire childhood, there is no stopping the potential that you can harness in your children.” Take to heart this lesson: extend deliberateness in all your relationships and use your gift of time to your advantage. Together, we are so much stronger, stable, and the possibilities are endless.
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